The part-time job that I never applied for

By TinaMarie Cerreta TinaMarie June 08, 2026

The Invisible Social and Emotional Toll:

Good Day Ladies and Gentlemen are you doing the dialysis dance, too?💃🕺

Today I want to address a topic that comes in many parts, so please, bear with me. We're dealing with "The Invisible Social and Emotional Toll that Treatment Takes On a Person". All I know is that when dialysis hit(on 04/02/2025) and a few days later when I wasn't literally comatose, my whole world changed...for real.

There were new rules to live (and eat) by, a new means to stay alive, a whole different routine to follow(and strictly so) and even more tests. Now the proverbial hoops I had to jump through got slightly smaller. The plethora of doctors, transplant coordinators, dialysis unit staff and transportation employees grew. Where I had one MAS transportation trip a week, I now have between 3 and 5 in the same week.

I can tolerate the treatments for the lengthy 3.5 hour sessions because I always have something to do. They have individual TV's for the patients, but I don't watch TV. I don't even have a TV in my home. I work on my tablet doing either "Lyric Challenges", "Theater 'Lyric' Challenges" or do an entry in my blog. Even though nobody is viewing my blog, I get such joy out of posting in them, anyway. On one hand doing the variety of topics makes me feel useful and on the other hand the reflection section cleanses my soul.

We'll take a hard look at real-world methods for managing these distinct challenges. We will address the mental health issues that arise, anxiety connected to the startling alarms on the machines, how to effectively communicate with others about your diagnosis and treatment choice, mental strategies and distractions, communication with your care team and reaching out locally. A lot to cover! So hold onto your blood/pressure cuff and join me for this wild ride.

The Clinical Reality: In-center hemodialysis typically requires 3 to 4 hours, three times a week. This eats up a massive portion of the week and disrupts normal routines.

Layman’s Translation: Dialysis is often a part-time job that you never applied for. The emotional toll—grieving a lost lifestyle, handling the anxiety of machine alarms, and dealing with well-meaning but ill-informed comments from others—is often harder to cope with than the physical symptoms.

Dialysis is a profound life adjustment that brings heavy grief, anxiety, and social friction. Acknowledging that these emotional challenges are harder than the physical symptoms is the first step toward building resilience. [1, 2]

The psychological load of end-stage renal disease requires the same—if not more—attention as your lab results. Actionable strategies to cope with these unique hurdles include: [1, 2]

Processing the "Part-Time Job": It is completely normal to mourn the freedom and daily routine you had before your diagnosis or injury. Instead of viewing your strict health care routine as a punishing second job, try to see it as a tool. It is actually the very thing that protects your independence and allows you to live life on your own terms. [1]

Here is how this advice breaks down in simple, everyday language:

Mourning is totally okay: It is normal to feel sad or frustrated about the "part-time job" of taking your medication, doing physical therapy, or going to doctor appointments. You never signed up for this, and it is natural to miss your old, care-free life [1, 2, 3]. [1, 2, 3, 4]

Shift your mindset: Instead of thinking, "I hate having to do all this work just to stay alive," try looking at your routine as a tool that empowers you.

It buys you freedom: Think of your strict daily care as a shield. Sticking to your regimen actually protects your body, prevents setbacks, and gives you the energy and ability to do the things you want to do. [1]

You are in control: Viewing your health routine as an optional "tool for independence" rather than a forced "job" helps shift the power back to you. You are doing these steps to take charge of your own well-being. [1]

Managing Machine & Alarm Anxiety: Familiarizing yourself with the technology can help strip away the fear of the unknown. During treatments, practice mindfulness, listen to calming music, or use noise-canceling headphones to tune out the clinical environment and ease anxiety. [, 2, 3]

Managing machine and alarm anxiety during in-center hemodialysis involves understanding alarm causes, practicing sensory coping strategies (like noise-canceling headphones), and communicating with your clinical team. Education and predictable routines help ease fears of equipment failure. [1, 2, 3] Navigating anxiety about your hemodialysis treatment requires both mental strategies and active collaboration with your care team to feel more in control of your sessions. [1]

Processing the "Part-Time Job": Grieving your lost lifestyle is a valid, normal response. Try to reframe the strict treatment regimen as a tool that preserves your autonomy rather than a job you never applied for. [1, 2, 3]

Managing Machine & Alarm Anxiety: Familiarizing yourself with the technology can help strip away the fear of the unknown. During treatments, practice mindfulness, listen to calming music, or use noise-canceling headphones to tune out the clinical environment and ease anxiety. [, 2, 3]

Questions: Ask your technician or nurse to explain what specific alarms mean when they go off. Understanding why a machine beeps demystifies the noise and reduces the feeling of panic.

Trust the Machine: If the machine indicates it is working, it is trustworthy. If it signals a true malfunction, your clinical team will address it or remove the machine for biomedical review. [1]

Common Alarms: Most beeps are routine, such as a kinked line, a positional change in your arm, or the end of your treatment time. [1, 2]

Mental Strategies and Distraction: Being mindful prevents "the crawlies" and panic from setting in. [1, 2]

Time Chunking: Break the 4-hour session into smaller 30- to 60-minute goals (e.g., watching one movie segment, playing a specific phone game, or reading a chapter of a book). [1]

Distraction Therapy: Immerse yourself in activities that require focus, such as handheld gaming, streaming movies, or catching up on work. [1, 2]

Breathing Techniques: Practice simple deep breathing or box breathing if you feel a rush of panic. [1, 2]

Sensory and Environmental Adjustments:You can manage the sights and sounds of the treatment floor to make the environment feel more calming. [1]

Sensory Management: Use active noise-canceling headphones to block out the beeping and chatter of the clinic. Listen to guided meditation, podcasts, or calming music to center your focus. [1, 2, 3]

Visual Barriers: Wear an eye mask or position yourself away from the direct view of the machines, if possible. [1]

Comfort Items: Bring familiar comforts from home, such as a favorite blanket, a neck pillow, or an aromatherapy item like peppermint-scented oils. [1, 2]

Communicating with Your Care Team:It is normal to feel overwhelmed. Allow your care team can support you. [1]

Medication Options: If natural remedies and coping mechanisms are not enough, speak to your nephrologist. They can evaluate you for short-term or situational anti-anxiety medications. [1, 2,]

Psychological Support: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and other psychotherapeutic interventions are effective for overcoming treatment-related anxiety or needle phobia. Ask your care team(especially your social worker) about mental health resources.

Staff Reassurance: Research shows that consistent visual contact and reassurance from your dialysis nurses significantly reduce patient anxiety.

5. Handling Others’ Comments: Well-meaning but ill-informed comments can be exhausting. Have a few polite but firm canned responses ready (e.g., "I appreciate your concern, but I'm being well taken care of by my medical team").

Handling well-meaning but ill-informed comments takes practice. Having a few polite, firm, and boundary-setting phrases ready can help you shut down unsolicited advice or incorrect statements while keeping the conversation respectful. [1, 2, 3]

Here are several canned responses tailored to different situations:

For Unsolicited Advice

When someone offers unwanted guidance on your life, career, or choices:

"I appreciate your perspective, but I'm confident in the path I'm taking."

"Thanks for sharing that idea! I’m happy with how I’m handling things right now."

"That's an interesting approach. I'll let you know if I decide to change my current plan."

For Factual Inaccuracies (When you don't want to debate)

When someone confidently states something that is factually incorrect:

"Actually, that isn't accurate, but I'm not looking to debate the topic right now."

"We'll have to agree to disagree on that. My understanding is quite different."

"That's a common misconception, but the reality is a bit more nuanced."

For Intrusive or Tone-Deaf Questions

When someone crosses a line regarding your personal life, health, or boundaries:

"I'm not comfortable discussing that topic, but I appreciate you asking."

"I'd prefer to keep that part of my life private."

"Let's shift the focus; how have you been spending your time lately?"

For Shifting the Focus

When you need to acknowledge their comment and completely change the subject:

"Thank you for the suggestion! Let's make sure we get through the rest of our agenda today."

"That's good to know. Anyway, have you had a chance to check out [Insert Subject] yet?

6. Connecting with Peers: Sharing your frustrations with others who truly understand the experience is incredibly validating. Consider joining mentorship and peer support programs through the National Kidney Foundation or the Dialysis Patient Citizens. [1, 2, 3, 4]

7. Reaching Out Locally: Speak directly to the renal social worker at your treatment center. In the Mt Kisco area, local hospital systems like Northwell Health or nearby centers can offer vital localized mental health resources and specialized support groups. [1, 2]

I hope you experience true joy this week. This concludes the blog post. Please come back for more! #dwalingwithdialysis, #parttimejob, #alarmingalarms,#talktothem, #findahobby, #blogposts, #quotefortheday

Tina

My quote for the day:

"We spend far too much time complaining about the way things are and forget that we have the power to change anything and everything." Bozoma Saint John